Poem I wrote

The stars shine less than bright
when I lack your eyes to see them with
my petals droop without your touch
and I am alone
I wander blindly through the night
and wither under the chiming skies
dim with the despair of solitude
I cannot last without your sight
your way of cherishing this silence
Our roots thirst in seperate gardens
two lonely wild flowers
we grow towards each others' light
and all that shines shines twice as bright.


Constructive critisism/applause?

omg thx you saved me a good five minutes of english homewwork next year

Very good. Thumbs up!

Thanks guys I wrote that one when my g/f and I took some time off. It was a "let's get back together, this isn't working" type of poem.

I've wrote a couple poems....pretty awesome poems for girls......they are in spanish though =D so even if i posted them you wouldnt understand...and if i translated it they wouldnt rhyme

Geez, I have noticed girls really go for poems. So, if you want to lull a girl, write a poem. It doesn't even have to be good, as long is it involves them metaphorically, or in person. Its great!

Back on subject. Critisism on the poem anyone?

dont let the chick know she has complete power over you.

*-Poem-*
Killing the demons within is to ask to much.
You cannot slay what you cannot see.
Your fate is inevitable.
Die! Die DIE!

Yea so I'm bored so what I thought it was a good poem

wow ummm yea...illusion's umm yours sucks

Spector, I wouldn't comment negatively when you have not even written one.

I'm sitting alone in the dark
My paper is covered in tear marks

Tonight I'm writting a letter
I don't know if she'll get it, I should know better

For some reason I have to send it
As long as someone gets it, she'll read it

Im not sure what the address is but I'm sure it's something like this
My mother, high in heaven, next door to grandma

I was only thirteen
The last time I got to say Hello or I love you

She left me alone
With no love in my home

I wish someone would have hugged me
Or even noticed me

They may have tried to talk
But i would just get up and walk

I just want to talk to mommy
To make sure she isn't mad at me

I love her
I wonder if I ever showed her...

My penis is large, it is full of juice and i want to put you on a noose i want to slit your throght (i think thats how u spell it) well anyways i want to slit your throught and eat your goat, sacrifice, scare off mice, eat some rice, lick my dice, your eyes, they glitter in pride, its like a... rollercoaster ride, i am jealous of your smile, i can look at it, only for a while, then i like to masturbate to your juvinile innocence, but when i die, it will be your fault, because you crushed me with your ass, whitch is nice, just like the rice it makes me feel like im sitting on ice, fire, fire, the roof, is it on fire? is it for hire? what do i desire? you... , you,

I love you



i want to slit your throught and eat your goat, sacrifice, scare off mice, eat some rice, lick my dice, your eyes, they glitter in pride, its like a... rollercoaster ride, i am jealous of your smile, i can look at it, only for a while, but when i die, it will be your fault, because you killed me in depression and the detectives think you did it, whitch is nice, just like the rice it makes me feel like im sitting on ice, fire, fire, the roof, is it on fire? is it for hire? what do i desire? you... , you, hows that one?!?

Spector, I wouldn't comment negatively when you have not even written one.

Ah, but i have, it was just in another thread:

The dread you fear when you wake up
You know sumthins gonna happen, and you lay awestruck
Then you remember the light of your day
The spark that lights the fire, you must be brave
As you walk to school, you remember what they said:
Wuss! Dirtbag! Your bloods gonna shed.
When you get to school they're already near
But you look to the right and she’s standing there
You turn back and they're already coming
Before you know it, your blood is running
Your world turns hazy, dark and gray
You feel relaxed, comforted in a way
When you wake up your head is throbbing
You look around and everything’s bobbing
Then you see her running down the aisle
And you can’t help but let out a great big smile

You showed me! lol

oo yeah i sure have

Time goes by
Within a day
But not as quick
As within a dream

I can’t seem to move
I can’t seem to wake
Within this dream
I can’t escape

The breeze goes by
The images float
Where is the exit
Someone will know…

I see memories of a distant past
Things that have happened from days that have passed
Like games that I’ve played
Also people I’ve met

An hour here
Feels like forever there
I hope it ends soon
I feel I can’t last.


There thats a little better i guess

welcome to the halls of the dead