Drinking Stories

Well then... due to the confined space of the chatbox, where this conversation started, I decided to post a thread!


Anywho, my one and only bar fight! In a small town called Oro Grande, CA, There is one restaurant, which is where I worked. There is also 2 large cement plants, and they change people more than most people change underwear! Most are from Texas, and you would be surprised at how nice they are compared to us California folk. Anyways, one of them decided to buy me a few drinks, being as we were getting close to closing. I had just put down my third one, when I noticed some trouble starting up. We had a Digital Jukebox, and you could play just about any damn song you could think of. So, a country song comes on, because them Texas guys love thier country, and one of the other patrons decides to pull the Texans' hat off. He feels its just a joke and goes to get it back, but the other guy starts getting offensive. Starts takling shit and getting in his face and what not. So my bouncer, who is a good buddy of mine, goes over to break it up. The drunk guy starts trying to get in his face, and starts banging his set. My bouncer tells him that shit doesn't fly in here, and the dude's hands flew up to grab my bouncer. By this time I come over to observe and make sure shit doesn't get out of hand, but I saw his hands just barely start to move, and my arm was around his neck. Not in a normal choke hold mind you. Don't know where my brother learned it, but something about it being military style. It's where you have your hand on the back of thier neck, pushing against your forearm, with your other hand on the inside of your elbow. Next thing I know, his homie is trying to get me in a head lock. I easily slip out, and push the first dude off to the side, and my bouncer grabs him, and chokes him out like... literally 5 seconds and he was out on the floor. So, as I push the other dude off me, I square up, and he starts trying to defend himself and his homie, saying the Texan started it. The Texan is a regular, and he has gotten really drunk before, but he has never been agressive. So anyways, it ended up spilling into the parking lot, and they ended up leaving. They apologized the next day, so it was all good.




Not only is that my ONLY bar fight... it's my ONLY fight outside of my family... and I know it wasn't really a fight...

Now let's hear yours!

Damn dude, I'm glad you didn't get hurt. Some people can be real heartless motherfuckers, regardless of alcohol. Fuel that with booze, and you have blood and obituaries just waiting.

Anyways, last fall I had this little fight with a dumb jock. It was last November. Now, I'm usually the complete hippie at the party. Naturally, I arrive around 11:00 PM, after getting completely ripped after work. I pay my five bucks, and get a nice miller light beer poured. It's a great party, I'm really hitting it off with this girl and just chilling with my friends. After about six more beers I'm feeling pretty good, and just chilling with my clique. All of a sudden this big jock comes up and pokes me in the shoulder. Now, I'm only 6'0 and 150 at the time, and he was about 6'3", prolly 200. "What's up man?" "You soccer fairy fag, why are you wearing that disgraceful shit around here?" I was wearing a Manchester United David Beckham Jersey. "Dude, relax, it's a party. You go have fun with your friends, and I'll have fun with mine". He drops his drink, full on shoves me in the chest and I drop my drink on the girl I'm chilling with. "Dude, you don't want to do this." He shoves me again "Fucking pussy." He lights a cigarello, and then proceeds to promptly put it out on my shirt. Not two seconds later I drew back and hit him as hard as I could square on the nose. Plop, he falls to the floor. "FUCK!" My hand heart so much, I thought I had broke it. He got up again, and left. His buddies just kind of left muttering fuck you's and what not. "Don't talk shit if you can't back it up, fag!" I yelled as he left.

That shit pissed me off. That jersey cost me 70 bucks, and it basically got ruined by some jerk who hates soccer. Luckily the girl understood that I involantarily spilled my drink. I had later fall-outs with that same jock, but none like this. He knew not to fuck with me, even though I'm a small guy. That just put me over the edge though. Fucking college.

I have so many..

I am an alcoholic. (If you consider drinking every weekend a bad thing)

I chugged half a gallon of water once at football practice. Omg I'm such a crazy person.

I pretty much have 2 or so beers every DAY. The weekends, now those are a lot more intense. Can't eat without a brew-ha!

You must be kidding, Titus! YOUR LIVER WILL NEVER WITHSTAND THAT BARRAGE OF PAIN!

A few years ago, probably when I was about 16 or so, me and 2 other good friends got completely smashed and decided to go meet someone to smoke down. I was the oldest person among us, and being 16 I still didn't have a driver's license.

Anyway, we decide to steal my dad's van to drive to this kid's house. We call him and he says to wait at Taco Bell for a couple minutes so he can meet us there and follow him. Well I get to Taco Bell and parked at the back close to a tall wooden fence. Randomly the youngest friend (15 at the time) asked if he could drive. For whatever stupid reason I decided to be generous and grant him driving permissions. Our smoking friend calls me and says to pull out of Taco Bell because he was about to pass it.

So my friend puts it in gear, and stomps on the gas.

3 Problems:

1. The Drive Through line of people was directly behind us.
2. There was a huge wooden fence in front of us.
3. He didn't put the van into reverse, he put it into drive.


SO - We run straight into the wooden fence, knocking a large portion over, and stopped directly on top of it. (The whole drive through line was staring at us, mind you.) So then me and my other friend start yelling "GO! GO! GO!" and we drive through another company's grass and then finally onto a road.

---------------------

We never got caught or anything, which is definitely good. And we went to Taco Bell the next day in a different vehicle, and saw some people re-building the fence. All of us couldn't help but chuckle.

You must be kidding, Titus! YOUR LIVER WILL NEVER WITHSTAND THAT BARRAGE OF PAIN!

I have a friend that does it and hes fine but later him and titus will be in pain for sure.