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A Day in the Life of Joe the Republican
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Posted 2011-02-16, 01:37 PM
Found this one the intarwebs, I got a kick out of it.



Joe gets up at 6 a.m. and fills his coffeepot with water to prepare his morning coffee. The water is clean and good because some tree-hugging liberal fought for minimum water-quality standards. With his first swallow of water, he takes his daily medication. His medications are safe to take because some stupid commie liberal fought to ensure their safety and that they work as advertised. All but $10 of his medications are paid for by his employer's medical plan because some liberal union workers fought their employers for paid medical insurance - now Joe gets it too. He prepares his morning breakfast, bacon and eggs. Joe's bacon is safe to eat because some girly-man liberal fought for laws to regulate the meat packing industry. In the morning shower, Joe reaches for his shampoo. His bottle is properly labeled with each ingredient and its amount in the total contents because some crybaby liberal fought for his right to know what he was putting on his body and how much it contained.

Joe dresses, walks outside and takes a deep breath. The air he breathes is clean because some environmentalist wacko liberal fought for the laws to stop industries from polluting our air. He walks to the subway station for his government-subsidized ride to work. It saves him considerable money in parking and transportation fees because some fancy-pants liberal fought for affordable public transportation, which gives everyone the opportunity to be a contributor.

Joe begins his work day. He has a good job with excellent pay, medical benefits, retirement, paid holidays and vacation because some lazy liberal union members fought and died for these working standards. Joe's employer pays these standards because Joe's employer doesn't want his employees to call the union. If Joe is hurt on the job or becomes unemployed, he'll get a worker compensation or unemployment check because some stupid liberal didn't think he should lose his home because of his temporary misfortune.

It's noontime and Joe needs to make a bank deposit so he can pay some bills. Joe's deposit is federally insured by the FDIC because some godless liberal wanted to protect Joe's money from unscrupulous bankers who ruined the banking system before the Great Depression. Joe has to pay his Fannie Mae-underwritten mortgage and his below-market federal student loan because some elitist liberal decided that Joe and the government would be better off if he was educated and earned more money over his lifetime. Joe is home from work.

He plans to visit his father this evening at his farm home in the country. He gets in his car for the drive. His car is among the safest in the world because some America-hating liberal fought for car safety standards. He arrives at his boyhood home. His was the third generation to live in the house financed by Farmers' Home Administration because bankers didn't want to make rural loans. The house didn't have electricity until some big-government liberal stuck his nose where it didn't belong and demanded rural electrification.

He is happy to see his father, who is now retired. His father lives on Social Security and a union pension because some wine-drinking, cheese-eating liberal made sure he could take care of himself so Joe wouldn't have to.

Joe gets back in his car for the ride home, and turns on a radio talk show. The radio host keeps saying that liberals are bad and conservatives are good. He doesn't mention that the beloved Republicans have fought against every protection and benefit Joe enjoys throughout his day. Joe agrees: "We don't need those big-government liberals ruining our lives! After all, I'm a self-made man who believes everyone should take care of themselves, just like I have."
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Posted 2011-02-16, 02:23 PM in reply to !King_Amazon!'s post "A Day in the Life of Joe the Republican"
that's so fucking hilarious. Goddamn, I wish we had people with opposite views on here so I could read some funny examples in their crazy fantasy world why this is wrong, and goddamn liberals this or that.

Good find, lmao.














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!King_Amazon!: I talked to him while he was getting raped
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Posted 2011-02-16, 03:24 PM in reply to D3V's post starting "that's so fucking hilarious. Goddamn, I..."
I'm sure Skurai will come up with something retarded to say, don't worry.
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Posted 2011-02-16, 09:54 PM in reply to !King_Amazon!'s post starting "I'm sure Skurai will come up with..."
!King_Amazon! said: [Goto]
I'm sure Skurai will come up with something retarded to say, don't worry.
Nope. This is pretty accurate.
Skurai
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Posted 2011-02-17, 11:19 AM in reply to !King_Amazon!'s post starting "I'm sure Skurai will come up with..."
Here's a response of this from another forum... lulz.

Joe gets up at 6 a.m. and fills his coffeepot with water to prepare his morning coffee.

Joe can get up at 6 AM in a free country and not one with a hammer and sickle or swastika on the flag or ruled by an ayatollah because of Republicans who were strong on defense.

The water is clean and good because some tree-hugging liberal fought for minimum water-quality standards.
Actually, thanks to the EPA, which President Richard Nixon, a Republican, signed into law. And the Clean Water and Clean Air Acts under Nixon, Reagan and George HW Bush.

With his first swallow of coffee, he takes his daily medication. His medications are safe to take because some stupid commie liberal fought to insure their safety and that they work as advertised.

Nowadays, no mainstream company would risk selling subpar drugs for fear of lawsuits, this is not a liberal/ conservative problem. The FDA by the way came into being under Teddy Roosevelt, a Republican.

All but $10 of his medications are paid for by his employer's medical plan because some liberal union workers fought their employers for paid medical insurance - now Joe gets it too.
At one time, workers had to fight for benefits, now it is a force of the free-market system that drives benefits to attract top level employees

He prepares his morning breakfast, bacon and eggs.
Joe's bacon is safe to eat because some girly-man liberal fought for laws to regulate the meat packing industry.

Again, see Teddy Roosevelt who signed the Pure Food and Drug Act into law.

In the morning shower, Joe reaches for his shampoo. His bottle is properly labeled with each ingredient and its amount in the total contents because some crybaby liberal fought for his right to know what he was putting on his body
and how much it contained.

See FDA and T.R.

Joe dresses, walks outside and takes a deep breath. The air he breathes is clean because some environmentalist wacko liberal fought for laws to stop industries from polluting our air.

See Nixon, Reagan and GHWB.

He walks to the subway station for his government-subsidized ride to work. It saves him considerable money in parking and transportation fees because some fancy-pants liberal fought for affordable public transportation, which gives everyone the opportunity to be a contributor.

Actually most public transportation in the U.S. was started as private enterprise until the liberal gov't taxed and regulated it into the ground (see Railroads, 1940's-1960's) necessitating these subsidies for survival.

Joe begins his work day. He has a good job with excellent pay, medical benefits, retirement, paid holidays and vacation because some lazy liberal union members fought and died for these working standards. Joes employer pays these standards because Joe's employer doesn't want his employees to call the union.

That's if Joe is in a union job, which many are not. It is to an employer's benefit to have high standards of benefits and working conditions to attract and retain quality personnel.

If Joe is hurt on the job or becomes unemployed, he'll get a worker compensation or unemployment check because some stupid liberal didn't think
he should lose his home because of his temporary misfortune.

This arose from the New Deal, and yes a Democratic president, FDR, but I wouldn't call him a "stupid liberal"

Its noontime and Joe needs to make a bank deposit so he can pay some bills.
Joe's deposit is federally insured by the FSLIC because some godless liberal wanted to protect Joe's money from unscrupulous bankers who ruined the banking system before the Great Depression.

Uh, the FSLIC doesn't exist anymore. You mean the FDIC. Only if he has less than 100 grand on deposit. This is federally subsidized insurance.

Joe has to pay his Fannie Mae-underwritten mortgage and his below-market federal student loan because some elitist liberal decided that Joe and the government would be better off if he was educated and earned more money over his
lifetime.

Uh... look where Fannie and Freddie got us...

Joe is home from work. He plans to visit his father this evening at his farm home in the country. He gets in his car for the drive. His car is among the safest in the world because some America-hating liberal fought for car safety
standards.

Again, market forces. People are attracted to high-quality, safe vehicles. This is not a liberal issue.

He arrives at his boyhood home. His was the third generation to live in the house financed by Farmers' Home Administration because bankers didn't want to make rural loans.

Wait, they were able to keep the house despite three generations of liberal inheritance and estate taxes?

The house didn't have electricity until some big-government liberal stuck his nose where it didn't belong and demanded rural electrification.

Kind of interesting considering many of the Congressmen lobbying for rural electrification were Republicans.

He is happy to see his father, who is now retired. His father lives on Social Security and a union pension because some wine-drinking, cheese-eating liberal made sure he could take care of himself so Joe wouldn't have to.

So his father worked for a union, that's great, he earned his pension. Social Security is a messed up, nearly bankrupt system that few people can live off of, and will not be around 40 years from now when I can collect. His union pension is far more beneficial.

Joe gets back in his car for the ride home, and turns on a radio talk show. The radio host keeps saying that liberals are bad and conservatives are good. He doesn't mention that the beloved Republicans have fought against every protection and benefit Joe enjoys throughout his day.

You got to be kidding me. Most free-speech restriction comes from liberals afraid of "offending" people who can't engage in political or social discourse. "Political Correctness" didn't come from Republicans. 2nd Amendment attacks don't come from Republicans.

Joe agrees: "We don't need those big-government liberals ruining our lives! After all, I'm a self-made man who believes everyone should take care of
themselves, just like I have."

Joe is reaping the benefits of a free society. He couldn't even write this in many countries.














Quote:
!King_Amazon!: I talked to him while he was getting raped
[quote][16:04] jamer123: GRRR firefox just like quit on me now on internet exploder[quote]
...
[quote=!King_Amazon!]notices he's 3 inches shorter than her son and he's circumcised [quote]
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D3V is convinced there are no coincidences, only the illusion of coincidencesD3V is convinced there are no coincidences, only the illusion of coincidencesD3V is convinced there are no coincidences, only the illusion of coincidencesD3V is convinced there are no coincidences, only the illusion of coincidencesD3V is convinced there are no coincidences, only the illusion of coincidencesD3V is convinced there are no coincidences, only the illusion of coincidences
 
 
D3V
 



 
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Posted 2011-02-17, 08:33 PM in reply to D3V's post starting "Here's a response of this from another..."
Both sides have valid points. Thou I must admit, those fucking liberals made eating bacon possible. That's causing others to sin, and, in a way, they have sinned by making it legal. Those fucking liberals
but I digress.
Skurai
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Skurai
 



 
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Posted 2011-02-18, 11:13 AM in reply to Skurai's post starting "Both sides have valid points. Thou I..."
striking through your words isn't creative














Quote:
!King_Amazon!: I talked to him while he was getting raped
[quote][16:04] jamer123: GRRR firefox just like quit on me now on internet exploder[quote]
...
[quote=!King_Amazon!]notices he's 3 inches shorter than her son and he's circumcised [quote]
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Posted 2011-02-20, 08:51 PM in reply to D3V's post starting "striking through your words isn't..."
Neither is politics
Skurai
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Posted 2011-02-21, 11:44 PM in reply to Skurai's post starting "Neither is politics"
I forgot how blind some people on this forum are when it comes to politics.
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Posted 2011-02-22, 09:58 AM in reply to Dar_Win's post starting "I forgot how blind some people on this..."
How do you figure?














Quote:
!King_Amazon!: I talked to him while he was getting raped
[quote][16:04] jamer123: GRRR firefox just like quit on me now on internet exploder[quote]
...
[quote=!King_Amazon!]notices he's 3 inches shorter than her son and he's circumcised [quote]
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D3V is convinced there are no coincidences, only the illusion of coincidencesD3V is convinced there are no coincidences, only the illusion of coincidencesD3V is convinced there are no coincidences, only the illusion of coincidencesD3V is convinced there are no coincidences, only the illusion of coincidencesD3V is convinced there are no coincidences, only the illusion of coincidencesD3V is convinced there are no coincidences, only the illusion of coincidences
 
 
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Posted 2011-02-22, 09:21 PM in reply to D3V's post starting "How do you figure?"
Look at all the Democrats!
Skurai
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Skurai
 



 
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Posted 2011-02-23, 10:20 AM in reply to Skurai's post starting "Look at all the Democrats!"

..is no laughing matter. Just because somebody is blind doesn't mean you should make fun.














Quote:
!King_Amazon!: I talked to him while he was getting raped
[quote][16:04] jamer123: GRRR firefox just like quit on me now on internet exploder[quote]
...
[quote=!King_Amazon!]notices he's 3 inches shorter than her son and he's circumcised [quote]
Old
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D3V is convinced there are no coincidences, only the illusion of coincidencesD3V is convinced there are no coincidences, only the illusion of coincidencesD3V is convinced there are no coincidences, only the illusion of coincidencesD3V is convinced there are no coincidences, only the illusion of coincidencesD3V is convinced there are no coincidences, only the illusion of coincidencesD3V is convinced there are no coincidences, only the illusion of coincidences
 
 
D3V
 



 
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Posted 2011-02-23, 04:28 PM in reply to D3V's post starting "How do you figure?"
D3V said: [Goto]
How do you figure?
It's all Republicans Vs. Democrats and Liberals Vs. Conservatives.

Then again that's how it is almost everywhere you go now....

Time to remove the parties and vote for people based on their own beliefs.
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Posted 2011-02-23, 04:54 PM in reply to Dar_Win's post starting "It's all Republicans Vs. Democrats and..."
Dar_Win said: [Goto]
It's all Republicans Vs. Democrats and Liberals Vs. Conservatives.

Then again that's how it is almost everywhere you go now....

Time to remove the parties and vote for people based on their own beliefs.
I used to say this until the GOP decided to take the batshiat insane approach to everything. I don't think the "left wingers" are always better or always right, by any means, but I certainly align myself more with them.
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