Let me tell you a little story about the origin of Panda's.
Like way back when panda's didnt excist I met a polarbear. We had good times running around and catching seals. But after a while the pbear said, fuck this cold ass place, I'm going to China and eat bamboo. I was like OOHHH HELL NO YOU DONT! But the pbear was already gone
. Years went by and in a desperate attempt to find my buddy pbear, I went to china. There after 13 years I found him, indeed eating bamboo. I was like wtf man, and we got in a big fight. Of course he couldnt do shit against me and I punched his eyes like a motherfucker so bad. I hit him so bad, his dna changed and gave him permanent black eyes.
Now I had the pbear looking like a clown and satisfied I took my leave. Well, since there werent any other bears around and he looked like a clown, he got desperate and raped and impregnated a koala. Because koala's are deeply religious, abortion wasnt an option. To make matters worse for the Koala family it turned out she got twins! A boy and a girl. The little bears grew up as outcasts and could only find comfort around eachother. Years went by and they were grown up. They were always together eating bamboo and killing tigers. Their love for eachother was unlike anything in the history of panda's. So naturally they fornicated and quickly build a nice little family of retard panda's just about able to sit on their asses eating bamboo all day long. The oldest male of each generation is responsible to impregnate all other females. Now these new age panda's are fed up with this incest bullshit, which is why they're almost extinct.
There you have it, the history of panda's.
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