World Record Thread

------- double post -----

squirt... ur such a friggin dumbass i don't know where to begin to flame you

squirt... ur such a friggin dumbass i don't know where to begin to flame you

Now who was it that wanted the shoulders? Randuin?

Feh, where was that hook tool...

FLame? GOod heavens no, you cannot cook this with an open fire! You must boil it my good man!

AH! THere it is! *takes a large handled device, that has several hooks on the edge, one is barbed and reaches down and out at a 45 degree angle, it hooks at the end, going back up about 4 and a half inches*

*takes knife, and slices a cross pattern just below the center of the ribcage, then places the bottom of the hooked device into it, rotates it down to align with the torso, and slides it up towards the bone*

*pressing down on the top handle of the device, the bottom hook already inside near his heart, raises upwards just above the top of the ribcage's top - near the neck*

lol !!! i bet i taste good

*with a disturbing scratching sound and a crunch, the device locks onto the central area of the ribcage's front, piercing back out of the body at hte top of the ribcage, and locking back down onto itself. what little blood is left is oozing out of the damaged flesh*

lol ouch

*with a crunch a crack and a snap, the ribcage breaks and the body becomes horribly disfigured as the bone tries to release itself out of the body* Ahh back to the good knife now

no anything but the knife

*slices across back to the side of the torso, pealing away strips of flesh fro the front of the body, and cutting away the pectoriol muscles and adjacent ones*

*beep* Ah the oven is done! *drops the tools, and goes back to the old eyeball and brain broth, stirs it briefly, and pours it ito a pan and places it into the oven*

*places timer on, and returns to the large device now straddled around a bloody and wilting corpse. firmly grasping the handle, and giving it a good few jerks, the ribcage snaps loose, and is pulled out from the torso - the boneless flesh slithers and writhes back onto itself, slurshing and gurgling*

man you should write a book lol

Actually I tried twice, I'm going to wait till I'm older and more experienced. I'm more keen as an artist then a writer. Oh! I've forgotten about the press. *Releases press, as it raises the meat sticks to the top, and bottom, ripping and tearing itself* *sigh* This is no good, *scrapes it up using a spatula, and tosses it in the corner wher e asmall hole resides. a few sniffs, and a few claws reach out and ensare the meat, dragging it within the hole as some ungodly creature consumes it* Good boy.

lol you should draw these images you talk about then

*saws through the other arm, slicing and removing the arm muscles and skin prior, and seasons them and presses them, then, returns to the collapses torso with cutting knife in hand*