Trolling Christians on Reddit

I'm not sure where to put this on the forums, I considered extended or lounge, move it if you can/need to. Also forgive the god awful formatting, lazy lazy.

"According to reading charts in schools, the bible is comprehensible by the 4th grade. So when I finally sat down to read some of it, college educated, about to turn 30, I couldn't help but notice that the Bible itself (I didn't write it, but I sure did read it) isn't conveying the events in the way I was raised to know them.

And the LORD God commanded the man, saying, Of every tree of the garden thou mayest freely eat: but of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, thou shalt not eat of it: for <in the day> that thou eatest thereof thou shalt surely die. (Genesis 2:16 and 17)

And the serpent said unto the woman, <Ye shall not surely die>: For God doth know that in the day ye eat thereof, then <your eyes shall be opened, and ye shall be as gods, knowing good and evil.> (Genesis 3:4 and 5)

<And the eyes of them both were opened>, and they knew that they were naked; and they sewed fig leaves together, and made themselves aprons. And they heard the voice of the <LORD God walking> in the garden in the cool of the day: and Adam and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the LORD God amongst the trees of the garden. And the LORD God called unto Adam, and said unto him, <Where art> thou? And he said, I heard thy voice in the garden, and I was afraid, because I was naked; and I hid myself. And he said, <Who told thee that thou wast naked? Hast thou eaten of the tree,> whereof I commanded thee that thou shouldest not eat?(Genesis 3:7 through 11)

And the LORD God said, Behold, <the man is become as one of us, to know good and evil>: and now, lest he put forth his hand, and take also of the tree of life, and eat, and <live for ever>: Therefore the LORD God sent him forth from the garden of Eden, to till the ground from whence he was taken. (Genesis 3:22 and 23)

In this story, "the LORD God" is clearly lying, making threats, unaware of what happened, and seemingly afraid of Adam and Eve becoming immortal gods, and for some reason doesn't want his servants to understand right from wrong. In contrast the serpent more-or-less self sacrifices himself for our well-being?"

I find it really funny how Christians fall all over this. For the sake of space, I include me quoting them and replying, instead of their full reply.

""But they did die in some sense, physically, and spiritually" I cover this in the original post, had to edit it to fix it.

"the consequences are listed in the next chapter." No, the consequence was listed as "immediate death" in that very same chapter.

"And, extrapolating, they died in the common sense" They would have anyway, there was a fruit of Life that God didn't want them to eat because it apparently works, right? If he needs to keep them from eating a fruit that would make them immortal, they they aren't, currently, immortal, and will die eventually anyway, regardless of what has happened "today". This is why I brought up 4th grade literacy levels. What is written is NOT what we are told is written.

"However, lying isn’t always bad. Even in the 10 commandments, lying, bearing false witness against your neighbour is specifically called out" This is literally two contradictory statements. Did god say Lying is bad, or not?

"Regarding tree of good and evil, I’ve read an interpretation where it’s likened to conscience - and it kinda makes sense. Our consciences aren’t perfect and are flawed" what does that mean, and why does God want us to Not have it, and the snake want us to have it?"

Now, this is where we stopped, this guy in particular, so full quotes


"Knowing [[said "the difference" at first, then edited instead to say "good and evil"]] didn’t help humans, as we can see it both from the later chapters, and the current state of the world. There unfortunately aren’t going to be very satisfying answers to every question aimed at the text of the Bible. It was costly to write books back then, so they condensed the information, and as a result, a lot of context was lost.

The text blames trespassing the command that resulted in eating from the tree of knowing good and evil for the current state of the world, which is broken and not good. You might not like this answer, but you clearly want to say God seems to be a tyrant - despite the perfect state of the Garden of Eden, and veganism, which btw was upheld by some early Jewish Christians - and the serpent the rebel seems to be good"

""Knowing the difference between* good and evil didn’t help humans, as we can see it both from the later chapters, and the current state of the world."

If God can see the future, and decides what happens, and the book of revelation said things would get this bad 2000 years ago, then technically we as a race have no agency in how bad he decided it will be 2000 years ago. If everyone on Earth Right Now was a perfect Christian, God will still have decided that everyone is going to turn against all the Christians in a prediction made 2000 years ago. [[I am literally trying to troll with this part ngl]]

"The text blames knowing the difference between good and evil for the current state of the world, which is broken and not good" You wouldn't be able to make this assessment if they hadn't eaten from the fruit."

honestly, the fact you can knock down the whole story on the first 2 pages is so sad

Fuck reading all of that, TL;DR?

Fuck reading all of that, TL;DR?

It's true, the Bible is a long, pretty much worthless, read. But going in order, start to finish does have a use, when it comes to poking holes in these peoples' uh, *fake french accent* how you say, *back to normal* foundation.