I must share

In all honesty, I just farted so loud that I startled myself.

I hate how furniture reverberates farts to all who are sitting on the same piece. Pisses me off.

what i want is a toilet that doesn't amplify and resonate my farts for all to hear when i take a shit

I read something years ago about Japanese public toilets that make funny noises (whistles or something) to cover up potentially embarassing user-produced sounds.

Not sure why having extrordinarily loud bird-calls coming from your stall is less embarrasing than farting.

"Hey, there's a party going on in that stall! Definitely not somebody taking a shit."

I think that toilet invented a few fetishes by itself.

I'd yell at people walking by.

Haha! Brilliant!

I'd love to have glass windows like that. Or even spectacles with that type of glass for the lense.