Computer fools

Oh boy, I have to admin for 3 exams, 3 days this week. The first two are just typing and proofreading, nothing special. It's the third, a Windows exam, that is driving me crazy. This is in addition to assisting in night classes for Word/Excel/Powerpoint/Windows XP (which is on a break at this point).

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Problems I've run into:

1) When I tell you to double click, I mean to click twice. It shouldn't be too much of an issue to figure that out, especially after I explained it to you twice before. But wait, this one requires a TRIPLE CLICK. Guess how many times you have to click on this one? No, not twice. Yes, with the left button. No, your other left. There you go, it's taken you a full minute to highlight that sentence.

2) When I say to go into the OPAC folder, I don't mean to attempt to open the Program Files folder. Do they even sound the same? You couldn't even open that folder correctly, so you actually failed at failing, that's great.

3) While everyone was on My Computer already: Floppy drive icon. Yes, the one that says "Floppy" by it, and has a floppy disk icon. No, that's a left click, try again. You click with the right button, as I've explained.

4) "Where do I go to open File New?"

5) You're actually asking me what the "up" button does? It moves up. You're welcome.

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I think I'll post more later..

I know what you mean...the other day my mom asked where she could find @, I said press shift + 2, she then says aaaah this is annoying, whats shift. I show her the shift key and I say again, now press shift + @, she tries to tap the buttons at the exact same time (first took a while to time it right). Nothing happens and I see her getting mad inside :P. So I tell her first press shift and then 2, she presses shift, lets go and presses 2...then finally after saying to press 2 while holding the shift key and only to let go after she had pressed 2 she managed to type @....wooohoo way to go mom!

I deal with this kind of shit daily at work...I have a guy who cannot save an excel file no matter how many times I explain it to him...I have been trying to teach him this for 4 years now....

You can't get 'em to save either, huh? Oh boy. That said:

6) OMG WHAT HAPPENED TO MY DOCUMENT I OPENED ANOTHER FILE AND THE FIRST ONE IS GONE OMG OMG. The solution is to click the button on the bottom of the screen, with the same file name as the one you "lost'. Which click, you ask? Left, as it always is. No, your new document isn't gone, it's in the same place as the first document.

7) "Go to Start-All-Programs-Accessories-Notepad". HELP I CAN'T FIND IT!!! I, of course, click on Start, go to All Programs, then Accessories, then Notepad. I get the standard "Oh." and life goes on.

8) No, the computer isn't broken. It's off. Hit the power button. The one that has the universal symbol for POWER on it, and the word POWER on it. It's one of two buttons on the entire case. Here, I'll do it then.

Pwn. But you can't hate someone for ignorance. Just because someone couldn't click their way out of Microsoft Word doesn't mean you have to hate them. It just means you have to kill them.

Lol muchos pwn.

Okay, Okay I got one.

No the computer isn't a robot. It can't vacuum for you. It's just a computer.

Okay... I suck at this. Damnit, post some more BC! (Btw, I do have some seriously hilarious stories from a friend who worked at an ISP. I'll throw a couple up when I get a chance.)

Guaahahahaha, I hate that.

With XP you have the shortcut on the start menu. I tell my parents to click those icons once. They keep clicking them (4-5 times) until a broswer loads. I tell them click once and wait, its not fucking magic, it needs to load, they still do it of course.

My dad, he cant even turn off the computer.