The Truth About Paladin Talents

Profile · 11:51 PM

Here is part of the problem, you are mis-pronouncing the names of all 3 trees!

Holy - (pronounced "buff-bot")
Protection - (pronounced "SwordNBoard")
Retribution - (pronounce "Bigazztwohander")

I will now explain the existance of every talent

Buff Bot Tree

T1

Improved Lay on Hands - "Look! Your mana eating heal now buffs too!"

Spiritual Focus - "Because healing in combat shouldn't take 10 sec per spell"

Improved Holy light - "Because someone in the game has to have the least mana efficient heals - it just happens to be you!"

T2

Revelation - "We noticed paladins couldn't kill themselves quickly enough"

Illumination - "Look! Mana Effecient heals! - sorta"

Improved Blessing of wisdom - "6 mana every 5 secs is worth 5 talent points right?"

T3

Divine Favor - "Look we made a healing talent combo!"

Improved seal of Righteousness - "2 DPS is worth 5 talent points isn't it?

Improved Flash of light - "look! the worst healing spell in the game is now slightly more mana efficient! do less for less!"

T4

Improved concentration Aura - "help the real casters in your party get their spells off in time!"

Divine Wisdom - "If you want to pretend to be a cleric here is a slight taste of cleric mana - good luck finding something to use it on!"

T5

Sanctity Aura - "Oops! forgot we took out all your holy damage spells and combat maneuvers 2 weeks before launch - maybe this will stack with your new proc based holy damage? No?"

Improved Seal of light - "See! now you can judge this and the warriors and rogues will be able to heal themselves! ... maybe?"

T6

Divine Strength - "Our Dev office is RIGHT DOWN THE STREET from a retail liquor outlet!"

T7

Holy Shock - "Heres one of your beta spells back, we called it a shock this time because when you compare it to earth, fire, and frost shocks you will be!"

Sword and Board Tree

T1

Improved Devotion Aura - "since you wont be holding aggro you better buff the cleric and mages ac"

Redoubt - "BTW - this tree is for shield users"

T2

Improved Blessing of protection - "Again, since you aren't holding aggro you better be ready to save someone else"

Toughness - "See - that shield bonus keeps getting better and better"

T3

Blessing of sanctuary - "Remember what we said about aggro? Help keep your friends alive!"

Improved Seal of Fury - "Here's some aggro! do your worst!"

Shield specialization - "You are using a shield right?"

Improved blessing of freedom - "Either you will be running away a lot with this build, or someone else will, this will help."

T4

Improved Seal of justice - "We are bad at math"

T5

Reconing - "Holy ShEEt! A good defensive talent! With all that pounding you can take you can generate a ton of extra attacks! - never mind, we nerfed it."

Holy shield - "How's that shield working out for ya?"

Improved Blessing of salvation - "Since you'll be taking fifteen minutes to kill a single mob, your aggro buff might as well last that long so your group can watch and laugh from close range."

T6

One handed Weapon specialization - "After noticing that we gave the Buffbot tree a crappy T6 power, we decided to keep things nice and even. And since you are using a shield anyway..."

T7

Repentance - "Oh wait, your entire build is like a thin piece of tissue paper VS casters? Here's a head start then!"

Big 2 Hander Tree

T1

Improved Blessing of might - "Again, we are bad at math; Again, 2dps is worth 5 talent points right?"

Benediction - "Because we originally conceived of paladins actually using the judgement spell, so this would make it suck just a little less."

T2

Two Handed Weapon Specialization - "If you are here you must be using a 2hder right? Here's a cookie!"

Improved Seal of the crusader - "Make that 2 hander REALLY Shine, now that you can make it faster and more powerful!.. oh wait, we nerfed this, nevermind"

T3

Deflection - "Well since you aren't going to use the shield that your whole class was based on - here's a 5% parry to replace all the blocking you are missing"

Vengeance - "Look DPS! Ha Ha Ha! just kidding, by the way, when we say 8 seconds, we mean 7, and since you are using a 2 hander that means 2 attacks - enjoy!"

Seal of Command - "Look your weapon does holy damage! Lots of it! But you don't get to know when! Isn't this fun!"

Anticipation - "Again, since you refuse to use your standard issue paladin shield (our motto 'not in the face') here is a slight chance to generate opponent misses in the 4 seconds between your swings.

T4

Improved retribution aura - "Hey look 25% improvement to your damage shield! Thats great right! since people will be hitting you all the time and all.. oh wait, we're bad at math, sorry."

T5

Precision - "since you will only get to attack about 10 times in a normal group encounter with that big slow 2hder of yours, and about 4 times in a pvp fight, you better make them count! +3% should do it right?"

Consecration - "Well since you don't have anything else to spend mana on in this tree we figured we would give you an impressive looking spell.. lookee that glow!"

T6

Conviction - "Okay, so Every class gets at least one improved critical attack talent;
Druids get theirs at T2 (animal form)
Hunters get theirs at T2 (ranged attacks, also a pet attack one at T4)
Mages get theirs at T3 (fire spells)
Priests get theirs at 6 (boosts anything that can crit, healing or damage)
Rogues get several - T1, T4, T5 (general melee at 1 and weapon spec later)
Warriors get even more (as they should) T1, T4, T5, T6 (general melee at 1 and weapon spec later)
Warlocks get theirs at T3 (destruction spells)
Since both priest and paladin start with a 'p' we put the paladin one on T6 also! Furthermore this keeps up our long tradition of the T6 powers blowing."

T7

Blessing of Kings - "Look 10% to EVERY THING! Isn't this the most amazing Buff EVER!.. wait, what did you say about diminishing returns, lack of front end stats and armor set changes?... Darn you MATH! DARN you!!!!"

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Side notes...

Holy shock gets 2 upgrades, and repentance and Blessing of kings don't. This is because you didn't say thank you.

All Classes have goofy crap in their talent trees, the paladin ones actually make an odd kind of sense other than the placement of holy shock, holy strength and blessing of kings...

I like pie.

( Taken From World of Warcraft Forums )

badboy

Is this supposed to be a joke or something?

!King_Amazon!

Ive noticed a lot of complaints about paladins lately, with regard to their low dps and limited combat options. But what players are forgetting is the main reason Blizzard programmed paladins. Paladins were not desgined to be hybrid tanks/healers, as many claim. Instead, paladins were designed to be played while downloading pornography.

Paladins have roughly zero amount of combat interaction, thus making them the perfect character to play while downloading massive amounts of hardcore pornography. Simply target a monster, hit "1", and minimize your window. Then sit back and enjoy amazing girl on girl action.
Because a paladin takes about one full minute to kill a monster, you can leisurely browse the erotic and pornographic fruits of the internet, without much concern over your paladin's welfare. After a mintute, I go back to WoW, and usually my paladin is still alive and ready to loot the corpse. This is what makes grinding so pleasurable and convenient for me; the abilty to simutaneously watch girls have sex with each other and level up at the same time. I doubt any other class has such an elegantly designed system, and I applaud Blizzard for their foresight in crafting a character that I can play with while playing with myself.

DPS? Who needs it? The quicker I kill something, the less time I have to watch my boobies. Combat interactivity? Overrated. Id much rather interact with the girls writhing on my computer screen. Yes, a paladin was created for the sole purpose of surviving a fight while you stream hot porn directly to your computer. That is why we have the high armor class, the healing ability, and the low, low, DPS.

As for PVP, nothing is better than getting into battlegrounds and soaking up the honor points while I watch girls take their clothes off for money. Only the minimum of interaction is necessary for a paladin to perform, and it is this very quality that I love most about my paladin. I doubt rogues get any time to watch porn while trying to vanish and rack up combo points, and I bet shamans havent seen a single naked breast while figuring out what totem to throw down before choosing which shock they are going to cast next.

In addition to grinding, we have several defensive options during combat that also allow us flexibility to download porn. Hammer of Justice allows us a quick 6 second glimpse at naked women while our opponent is stunned, and Divine Shield allows a leisurely 12 seconds of quality right-hand time. Indeed, paladins have cornered the market on the pornography during playtime of World of Warcraft gameplay.
It saddens me that many paladins do not take advantage of the main functionality of their character, and are in fact lobbying for increased DPS or more combat options, unnecessary frivolties that would only harm our pornography downloading efficiency. Instead, we should thank the fine programmers at Blizzard for crafting a character that is great to grind with while grinding your loins.