From what I saw in Vegas, most patrons of strip clubs are cheap asses that just want a free show. I was throwing 1's and I'd give the really nice looking/skillful girls a 5ver, and you would have thought I was a celebrity with how much attention I was drawing. Although I think Klo told me she worked at the Spearmint Rhino or one of the nicer clubs. I've never actually patronized anything but the shitholes, so I can't really say what the nicer places are like.

The best strip club I've been to is hands-down in Topeka, Kansas, of all places. Strip clubs in Utah suck ass because:

1. If they serve alcohol, the girls have to wear pasties and have everything covered up.

2. If you want to go to a full-nude club, you have to go to one that doesn't serve alcohol.

3. In either case, you have to stay 5+ feet away from the girls at all times and there's no such thing as a lap dance in Utah.

Also, any imported beer here has to be 3.2% ABV or 4.0% ABV if it is from a local brewery. Utah is also the only state in our country to define the size of a shot, and it's basically half the size of what you would get if you went anywhere else and asked for a shot. Oh, and every time I go in a bar, my license has to be scanned.

Fuck Mormons.