My experience: sweet/shy/bashful girls want to be wooed. Nice guy with a dash of cocky works here. Tough/arrogant/bitchy girls love to be dominated. Confident and assertive with a pinch of sweet occasionally surfacing works best here.

People that are into bedroom power play generally act the opposite of their social role in life. If a girl is super aggressive, she probably loves to submit to a stronger man. If a guy is a macho war mongering repub, he's probably someone's gimp.