Life's Calling?
 

Does anybody ever wake up every day and wonder where their life is going to take them next? I have this feeling every single day at one point throughout the day and I always have to sit back and wonder what my calling is.

I don't have the best feeling about working 9-5 my entire life. Even if you guys don't believe it, I feel I am too creative to be droning away mindlessly on a computer for hours at a time wasting my life away. I want to become more constructive, in whatever way it might be. I just don't know where to head, or how to become what I feel one day I am destined to be. For some reason music seems so natural for me, but I don't think i'm cut out for it. What to do?

I know the feeling. I've decided that I'm going to keep persuing my college education, get a bachelor's in chemical engineering rather than going for my Ph.D. I'm going to keep at the guitar, and ideally I want to make money that way. The only reason I'm finishing college is so I have something to fall back on. A bachelor's in chemical engineering is still going to make me plenty of money.

See, your planning is somewhat like mine. I still am wanting that full college education to fall back on, but I don't think as of right now that it is my calling, or atleast my invisioned calling. It's not even anything that has been brought on by the large usage of marijuana, this has been a feeling I've had from a young age near 5-6 or so (from what i've been told). It just is frustrating feeling you can be/do so much more with your life and you are stuck being content.

I just don't really like the kind of person that science/technical shit makes me. It feeds my superiority complex and makes me more of an asshole than I am already. Music is a lot more calming, soulful, etc. It just makes me a happier and a nicer person, I think.

I am planning to minor in music theory, assuming I can stand it. I've yet to take a single class, so I don't know if I'm even going to like it. It might just suck all of the fun out of music, I dunno.

I have conversations with Chruser about this type of thing... just far more detailed and articulate. Oh, and cynical.

You should have those conversations in this thread.

They are too disjointed and spontaneous. By now we have a manner of speaking that really only makes sense to us... by which I mean we suddenly pick up topics with no apparent context so posting a log of it wouldn't be lucid enough to make worthwhile.

No, I don't get that feeling. Go to college, get a degree, possibly a master's, and then latch on to a company from there. That's my plan.

Lately I've been finding myself panicing at random moments with the urge to just...get away. To move away, get away from everyone I know.

My life is certainly not turning out like I had hoped it would when I was younger...

What do you think went awry?

I could say I'm not sure, but...I think part of it is because of my lack of putting myself out there when it comes to dating. That's not the only reason, and I'm unsure about the rest.

I don't even honestly care about anyone else in my life to an extent. Like I feel like I need to just have total control over what's going on and I need to make a change happen, and it needs to happen soon because this current path I am on is a garbage shithole to nowhere, and it's coming fast to a point where I won't be able to change anything.

It's a really common feeling, especially for people around our age. We're still young, but the realization that we're moving toward a path of permanence is rearing its head and we're not entirely sure what it is or what the calling that will lead us to it is.

I guess that really could be the reasoning behind things.

For me that's what it's been.

Have you been able to figure out exactly why you keep yourself inside a shell, for example? What is holding you back from being more outgoing?

This much is true...

I'm still in Highschool, but I'm taking Art classes, and maybe Cullinary when I can. I was to be a Cartoonist, if not, then a cook... but I'm not sure what happens if I fail at both....

when i younger i allways wanted to be an astronaut but now im wanting to be a computer programer and work for like the airforce

Why do you want to work for the airforce? You don't have to go into the Air Force to become a computer programmer, actually it's a lot easier by not joining the military and doing what you want.

I am going to be famous. And music is going to be my calling, one way or another.