Jesus was a Jew
 

You know, Zonalon keeps going on and on about how Jews are so evil, and then he blows up at someone (can't remember who off the top of my head) for making a joke about Crucificion, so it's safe to assume he's catholic. Has it ever crossed his pathetic little mind that the person/deity his religion revolves around was, in fact, himself a jew? :)

I'm sure he has an excuse for that. The jews probably made that up or something. Anyways JR we've all figured out theres no point in debating w/ someone who won't listen to pure truthfull logic. If you can't listen to logic, you need bite the curb.

Bite the curb? Sorta like in American History X, I guess. Speaking of which, I bet he just loooooooved the first half of that movie, but the second half, where the main character learns a little tolerance, was "re-written by the jews"


Also, it's the Bible that says Jesus was jewish, so I would be pretty interested to listen to him fight this one, just for the entertainment value.

Obviously the Jews wrote the bible.

Then Jews control his faith, too. Making him Jewish!

Hence: Zonalon, Resident Jew

Biting the curb didn't originate from American History X, but yes it was in that movie.

I didn't think it had originated in that movie, it was just the first place I had heard of it.

Biting the curb started in the Mafia days.

I bit a curb once. I think it gave me TB.

I bet Mary Magdalene gave Jesus TB. She was a hooker, after all.

What The Fuck???? When Did Jrwakebord Come Back?????? Omfg!!!!

Hello Captain Obvious

He only came back because he thought you were gone for good.

Thanks a fucking lot, asshole.

I did indeed make my return. And hello to you as well.

Jesus probably stole Christianity from the Jews. They probably had it hidden away in a covenant marked "Plan B." Fucking Jesus.

who's the asshole? me or hades?

Him, for existing. And you, for having money. (Therefore making you a Jew.)

So I crucified Jesus? Sweet.

Mel Gibson is gonna fucking kick your ass!

He's racially aware!

Hmm... If jews control the media and movies, how did a movie trashing jews get out, and how did it get so much publicity?

So that the Jews can make you believe they aren't really there!

Actually, you should have never believed they were there!

So actually they're convincing you to be convinced that you were never convinced!


They're so.. tricky.

And they make a handy profit while doing so, too

How many times do I have to say it? Captain Obvious is dead. Captain Bovious killed him and took over.

I'm gonna go buy a yarmulke and keep it under my hat.

Yah but I was resurrected. Just like Jesus.

Does that make Captain Bovious Jewish?

Well you already said Captain Obvious is jewish because of money. So I guess Bovious could be jewish as well.

And Jesus was a Jew.. [ iron clad source: http://zelaron.com/forum/showthread.php?t=35939 ] so it all makes sense.

I guess since I am Jesus I qualify as an iron-clad source. Hear that Zonalon? I AM YOUR MESSIAH!!

No. I'm the messiah.

Yah, I guess having a black Messiah would piss zonalon off even more. How about I get to be Jesus on M-W-F, and you get to be Jesus tuesday-thursday? saturday and sunday can be resolved via rock paper scissors.

I've been the sole Jesus on these boards for the last 6-8 months, and I'm not willing to relinquish that position.

Well since you've been Jesus, has zonalon said anything about the fact that his racist ass is worshipping a black guy?

Actually, I was the Mexican Jesus years ago.

I bestow Burrito miracles upon thee all!

Nothing would make me happier than for Jesus to have been homosexual. Then all those ignorant right-wing nutjobs would finally have to stfu.

THis is a well known fact!

To everyone but Zonalon, it would seem

Does he know any truth? I think not.

All he knows is what he was probably (sadly) brought up to believe by racist parents and friends.