Dead as fuck
 

i am dead as fuck right now, 9 bullets from a nine, 2 shells from a shotgun, 2 rockets shoved far up my ass, and sstill more to cvome tonight

Woot! Look at me. I'm so cool. I'm not high like you mainstream motherfuckers! I'm dead! Aren't I a badass?

Point of this thread: QUIT FUCKING POSTING "I'm so High" Threads.

Dude I just shot myself in the leg with a 45 and it fucked me up.

We must be the two illest motherfuckers up in this joint, yo!!

Two rockets shoved far up your ass, you say?

Far up my ass.

That'd be like running into the White House with a pipe bomb shoved up your ass...

Or running up to the President, offering him a gun-shaped pretzel.

Or or or...like wearing vertical stripes at a horizontal stripes party!! EL OH EL!

Or like, using the rough dildo at a smooth dildo party....

The sad part is, is that i EXPECTED you to say that.

The sad part is, you'd go to one of those parties.

Does someone have a gun to your head forcing you to read a thread that has its title set as "IM STONED", or "IM BAKED". No? Quit bitching. You don't like it, fine, Ignore it. It's not going to stop so why continue to make a big deal out of it.

The saddest part is, that you would be the host of the party.

No, no i dont think i would've gone to your party.

Sorry. :grin:

But I'm doped down dead as fuck, yo. Check it, I'm tight of the hizeel. I got capped by at least 7 grams...err, bullets and that makes me down. I just had to get on the internet and boast about it yo. I got shot like 50 times today. And I'm not even counting from last week when I was so dead I couldn't even wake up till the next day, yo. Man, let me tell you a story.

So I was on my way like a good little boy to a friends house. Well it turns out my friend was badass, and had a huge-ass bong...I mean gun. And my friend was like, "Yo, this is some dope shit, you want to get hit by some of this shit?" And I was like, "Yo, no man, I'm bullet free. I ain't in the ghetto, yo." And he was like, "Try some of this shit yo. This is some good shit. It'll knock your ass out." And I was like, "Nigga please." And you know tha peer pressure always wins, so I was like, "Aiight, nigga, pull out the nine and cap me with one." At this point I was thinking I was ultra-badass, because only the realest motherfuckers can get capt with a nine, yo. Well, all of a sudden my friend pulls out his double-barrel shotgun. And I was like, "Yo nigga, shouldn't I try some of the little shit before I get into the big shit?" And he was like, "Nigga, you crazy. Nigga I swear to god, this is some of the best shit you is ever gonna have. I even laced it with some nine-milis, yo." And I was like, "Aiight," ya know, because being shot with a nine would've made me a ultra-badass, but this would make me a super-duper-flippity-floppity-flooping-ultra-badass. And so he shoots me. And after that I just flipped. I was so fucking dead it's not even funny. But then that nigga shot me again. That's how I died by them two shotgun shells. But man, I was so fuckin dead, we just started talkin about the craziest shit, cuz you know, he was dead too. We started talkin about religion and deep shit, yo. I swear to god, being shot by a couple of shells is no harm at all! Everyone should try it at some point in their life. So afterwards my friend is like, "man, is this your first time dying?" And I didn't want to look like a pussy, because dying is so bad-ass, so of course I was like, "Fuck nah, nigga." So my friend is like, "Yo, nigga, you ever tried a rocket sandwich?" And I was like, "Nah nigga, what the fuck is that shizzle?" And he was like, "Nigga try some of this stuff." And so he brought out a few Rocket sandwiches. No need to worry, because these rockets were from his garage, so we knew they were perfectly safe and couldn't harm us. Anyway, we were so dead by that time that we didn't know what the fuck we were doing, yo. Nigga, we just started doing some crazy shit. Anyway, we sat down on the table, and decided that it was time to eat our rocket sandwiches. But we were so dead by this time, we decided to eat them the south park way, yo. We wanted to see if we could eat the sandwiches up our ass, and regurgitate them from our mouth. And so here we are sitting on these two delicious-ass rocket-sandwiches. Anyway, I got one up in there pretty good. And then the shit hit me. I was like, "Yo man, this shit is da muthafuckin bomb, yo. I'm hallucinatin and shit. Oh fuck, nigga, I just killed yo muthafuckin moms. Bahh well. We dead too, so that's quite aiight mah nigga. Nigga, hit me up with another one of them Rocket sandwiches." And that's how I got them two Rockets lodged way up in my ass. I wouldn't reccomend rocket sandwiches unless you have a strong stomach. And so I was on my way home, but I was like, "Nigga I done did everything already, I might as well take some nines." And so I shot myself nine times with the nine, until I just felt like I was about to OD, which would be okay since I was dead. Anyway, now I'm home, and I'm tellin yall, my best internet buddies, whom I must impress so that my dick can get a massage from a girl. I just had to let y'all know, I am one crazy-super-duper-flippity-floppity-floopying-mayo-mayo-muthafuckin-badass!

Your free speech ends at the tip of my nose.

Nigga, you just mad cuz I'm down.

Or a pretzel shaped gun

dont.say.joint.lol.lol.imma.smoke.now.then.slit.my .wrists.because.my.parents.think.im.a.druggy.and.a .loser

Thats cool! Cause apparently, unlike a majority of people, I used my ignore skill to completely disregard anything you said! It wasn't hard, and it didn't hurt either!

Nigga, I'm down wit' dat, yo. I know where you comin from, nigga. Yo, when I'm dead as fuck I ignore everything too, yo, like traffic laws and that little kid that was out in the middle of the street. He joined us! He's dead as fuck too yo. I'm such a muthafuckin badass!

stop posting

stop living

That nigga got pwnt by mah nigga Grav!

A-fucking-men!

I also seemed to have blown my brains out by accidentally pulling the tirgger as I cleaned out my shotgun :(

You're acting like doing drugs is bad.

Yeah yeah yeah i know its bad but its not always for the same fucking reasons you're saying. Some people get pushed into it, some people dont want to do it but are addicted to any sorts of drugs. Im not just talking about zelaron, if you want people at zel to stop posting " Im high as fuck" threads then ask them nicely. If they dont stop, then theres not a fucking thing you can do about them smoking. Stop acting like drugs are the fucking devil when there are hellla worse things to worry about. You dont just DIE from doing drugs. You also dont take people with you. Half the time people that smoke just fall asleep, but when your drunk is when you can really take people with you.

I'd feel a LOT safer//happier if they changed the drunk rule with weed rule...

Mjordan, you're BLACK, why dont you smoke too?

Because he is dead, duh!

Anyway, when people post these types of threads they don't do it to brag. It just sorta comes natural. If you get raped by mantra, you're probably going to post about it so people can share similar experiences. Nahmean?

Exactly.

So, STFU Mjordan.

For the most part, it is. If for no other reason, it's blatant disregard of the law.

No shit. That's just my experience from when I was dead.

Never works.

You're damned right there's not a thing I can do about them smoking. Quite honestly, they can go get high all they want. They can come back and post about their experiences too. It's funny to listen to it. But this: "i am high as fuck right now, 9 bowls of high scale middy's, 2 blunts, 2 joints, and sstill more to cvome tonight" is just completely moronic, and it seems like they're just doing it to brag. I've smoked weed too (although I don't anymore), but there's no reason to boast about it. I don't come here when I'm high and spew the same bullshit. It was funny once. It was funny twice. Now it's annoying.

The fact that they're doing drugs, though I see it as pretty stupid now, isn't so bad. Hell, I've done it too, so I can't really say much. It's just the fact that this place is so infested with the same drivel day in and day out that bothers me. Zelaron used to be a place where interesting conversations took place, and the direction that Zelaron is generally taking bothers me. More or less everyone acknowledges that the past few weeks/months have been slower than normal. Well, no wonder. Any possible newcomers thinking about joining have probably been scared away.

As I already said, it's not the drugs that bothers me, but the content of people's posts. I'm not saying it's only these "I'm so high" threads that bother me, there are other equally useless things too, but this one was right in my face and set me off. Also, I must say, that of all the useless posts that I see, it's the "I'm so high" one I see duplicated most often.

I thought you said I was white.

You people are hurting the internet!

PS: I agree with everything mjordan2nd is saying.

In short: What you do on your own time is your business. There isn't anything wrong with responsible drug use. There is definitely something wrong with being a total idiot.

Yeah i was totally oblivious to the point of this thread.

Guess i'm just as stupid as i am blind :)

Anyways, yeah i agree, but the way you're posting it, " i'm dead ". It makes me think you're mocking people that do it. I've yes smoked before and im not going to say that i havnt, but i look down upon it to this day. The only way that its OKAY if you do drugs is if you are respoinsble(like Robotic said above me).

Also, you've got to consider this ONE rule.

1. Is the user creating this thread a total moron

(YES)

(NO)

If you chose yes, then view, but dont be too harsh, for you know what you're getting youself into.

You read the users name, its I_scrwed_ur_ma or whatever.

Sounds like another the1 or Zagggon clone to me o_O

I'm not really mocking the fact that they do drugs, but more of the content that's posted while they're under the influence. It's pretty obvious that I am mocking it, though, since the original post in this thread was a copy of one of the "I'm high" threads with a few words changed.

True, but you have to say something after you see it for the millionth time.

HAHA! Once again, true.

I'm sorry I come here and post high but when I get home for the night, what the hell else am I gonna do? I normally like to make a pizza post away on Zelaron. Sometimes, I look back on it and realize I sounded like a dumbass but oh well, I had fun.