Zelaron Gaming Forum - World Record Thread

Zelaron Gaming Forum (http://zelaron.com/forum/index.php)

- World Record Thread (http://zelaron.com/forum/forumdisplay.php?f=253)

- - World Record Thread (http://zelaron.com/forum/showthread.php?t=27916)

Quote:

Originally Posted by Chruser (Post 667715)

http://www.zelaron.com/gear/tunnel.jpg

Wow...if those images were describing me, ouch, I'm now hurt. :cry:

Reality is a collective hunch.

http://www.garfieldminusgarfield.net

Quote:

Originally Posted by Chruser (Post 667719)

Reality is a collective hunch.

http://www.garfieldminusgarfield.net

Hmm, interesting site you found there.

"Garfield Minus Garfield is a site dedicated to removing Garfield from the Garfield comic strips in order to reveal the existential angst of a certain young Mr. Jon Arbuckle. It is a journey deep into the mind of an isolated young everyman as he fights a losing battle against loneliness and depression in a quiet American suburb." - Garfield Minus Garfield

Quite an interesting site. I never would have gotten that out of the Garfield comic strips.

Bob the builder? Beats me. If I were a caring parent, I'd sign a permission slip to allow my brain out on a field trip to try and understand, but I'm not.

Btw, it isn't one of those things that'll make us shit bricks (that is, brix shall be shat) when we work it out, is it?

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lenny (Post 667727)

:D

All you have to do is change the file name from filename.jpg to filename.rar and unrar it see the contents. Do it and shit brix!

It's like Salad fingers, accept Less animated.

fucking cookei dough hump sex......... i got my face slapped!

Quote:

Originally Posted by kyeruu (Post 667767)

fucking cookei dough hump sex......... i got my face slapped!

Pwnt.

Skurai, where did you come from?

Quote:

Originally Posted by Wallow (Post 667880)

Skurai, where did you come from?

well, you see...when a Mommy and Daddy get together...

They screw!
Then I come spewing out of her Vajayjay 9 months later, and deprive her of sleep for about a year or so. Then I still take away some of it for one or two years, and make their scheduel very narrow, until I'm a Teen. Then I just argue and piss them off...

and that's How I came to be.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Skurai (Post 667887)

Ha. Well Wallow, he technically answered your question.

http://dump.nrgs.org/ext/yahoo-answer-wait-what.png

What in the hell? I found this, took the picture, paint edited out the fluff, added "knowledge fail", and I laughed.

Edit: Oh, and here is the actual link so that you know that it's real. http://answers.yahoo.com/question/in...1002129AAe7okP

GLG you are straight outta 4chan.

Garfield without Garfield is weird and awesome at the same time

Quote:

Originally Posted by -Spector- (Post 668207)

GLG you are straight outta 4chan.

I am, oh crap. Hey, rule 1 damn it.

So0o0o0o0o0o0o much spam :whore:

Huahahaha!!! Dance Puppets dance!!!!
*plays with Puppets, that resemble people spamming the interwebz*

Wacky inflateable arm flailing tube man!

Dum, ditty dum, dum, dum.

Hmm...something just came to mind...
----

De, da, de, da dum
Joseph Smith was called a prophet,
dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb.
He started the Mormon religion,
dumb ,dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb.

Man1: There goes that cooky Joseph Smith.
Man2: You know he claims he spoke with God and Jesus.
WMan: Well, how do you know he didn't?

Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb
Joseph Smith was called a prophet.

Man: Hey Joseph, I told my wife you spoke with God and Jesus; And she didn't believe it.
Joseph: Well it's true, I did.
WMan: Where?
Joseph: I was out in the woods praying. I was asking God if I should be a Prodestant or Cathlic, or what? And suddenly, God and Jesus appeared before me. And they said I should start my own church because none of the others had it right. And that's exactly how it happened.
Man: You see, you believe it now?
WMan: Well yeah, sure. Why would he make that up?

Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb.
Many people believed Joseph,
dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb.
And that night he saw an angel,
dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb.

Joseph: And please bless mother and father. And please keep our bellies full of yum yums and lucious cookies. ... AW! Oh my gosh.
Angel Moroni: I am Moroni. I am a Native American.
Joseph: A Native American? But your skin is white.
Angel Moroni: Yes, long ago all Native Americans were white. We all to America from Jerusalem. And while we were here we were visited by Christ.
Joseph: Jesus lived here in America?
Angel Moroni: Yes, eventually my people were killed by the other tribe of Israel. And as punishment, God turned their skin red.

Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb.

Angel Moroni: There is an acient book buried near here, written on gold plates that account my peoples lives. Also buried with the book are two seer stones. The Urim and Thummim, which will allow you to translate the writings. Find it, and fulfil your destiny.
Joseph: Wow...

Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb.
Joseph Smith was called a prophet
Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb.

------

Jospeh: I found them, I found them. You're not going to believe it everybody, I found them.
Man: Found what?
Jospeh: Another new testament of Jesus Christ.
{Crowed saying things like "huh", "what", "who"}
Jospeh: Last night a Native American Angel told me where I could find another testament of Jesus Christ. I dug around all morning where the Angel told me to look. [Maybe there is isn't anything out here. Wait a tick, what's this?] Inside the stone box I found the magical Seer Stones. Under that I found four gold plates written with strange writting. [This must be the gospel that Jesus told the Nephites.] Well, they were the most amazing things I'd ever gazed upon.
Man: Well, so where are they?
Jospeh: Where are what?
WMan: The gold plates and the Seer Stones. Where are they?
Jospeh: Oh, oh, well, I was not allowed to take them. You see, after I found the plates the Angel Moroni appeared to me again and said that I am not allowed to show the plates or Seer Stones to anybody. Because first I must translate what's written on the plates into English, so you can all read it.

Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb.

{Crowed: Wow, that's amazing.}

He found the stones and golden plates,
dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb.
Even though nobody else ever saw them,
dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb.

--------

Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb.

Harris: What's this all about Mr. Smith?
Joseph: Mr. Harris, can you keep a secret?
Harris: Well, sure I can.
Joseph: I have, in my possession, an ancient book written on gold plates that tells of Jesus Christ's second coming here in America.
Harris: In America? Really? That sounds kind of...

Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb.

Joseph: It's true. And I'm going to translate the plates and publish it into a book for the whole world to read. Now ah-ah, I know you have a lot of money, Mr. Harris; and I'm just going to need a little bit to pay for the publishing costs.
Harris: I don't know. Uh, how do you expect to translate it?
Joseph: With these.
Harris: Rocks?
Joseph: They're not rocks. They're seer stones, given to me by an angel. With them, God allowed me to translate the plates into English. Watch. You take this quill and paper and write down what I say. Sit here. I have the golden plates here in this hat. I need to have them somewhere dark so I can read the spiritual light.
Harris: Really?
Jospeh: Now, when I put the Seer Stones into the hat, the ancient letters light up and change into English. Which I can, then, read to you.
Harris: Wow.
Jospeh: Oh, I'm seeing the lilght. Oh, okay, write this down. And so it was that Christ appeared before the Nephites.

And that's how the Book of Mormon was written
Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb.
Dumb, daumb dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb,
Dumb, daumb dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb,
Daumb daumb dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb,
Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb dumb, dumb.

Martin went home to his wife,
dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb.
And showed her pages from the Book of Mormon,
dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb.

Harris: And so Jospeh Smith put his head into a hat and read to me what the golden plates said. I wrote it all down and we're going to publish it into a book.
Lucy: Martin, how do you know he isn't just making stuff up and pretending he's translating off golden plates?

Lucy Harris, smart, smart smart.
Smart, smart, smart, smart ,smart.

Harris: Why would he make it up?

Martin Harris dumb, da dumb

Lucy: Alright, here. I'm going to hide these pages. If Joseph Smith really is translating off of golden plates, then he'll be able to do it again. But if Joseph Smith is making it all up, then the new translations will be different from these.
Harris: Okay, fine. I bet he'll have no problem.

Lucy Harris smart, smart smart,
Martin Harris dumb.

So Martin went on back to Smith
Said the pages had gone away
Smith got mad and told Martin
He needed to go pray
~Dumb dumb dumb dumb dumb.

Harris: Look, ah, I'm sorry about losing the pages we worked on, Joe, but I'm ready to write it all down again if you translate from the plates.
Jospeh: I would love to, Martin, except, I just had a vision. And the Lord said he's very angry with me for letting you take those pages.
Harris: He is?

Dumb, dumb ,dumb, dumb, dumb.

Jospeh: Yes. He is so mad, that he will never let me translate from the plate of Lehi again. He said we must now translate from the plate of Nephi. So it will be the same basic story, but written a little differently.
Harris: Wow, if God got angry with you, then you must be telling the truth.

Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb dumb.

Harris: Alright, let's get to work.

-----------------------------------------

Who else knows where this came from?

Oh, and if you're wondering, I just watched this episode streaming and wrote all of this down. Probably just wasted a good hour of time.

I love that episode of South Park!!!!

Damn it, they need to bring back games on the Window console and Gorgoth.

Code:

#include <iostream>

#include <string>

using namespace std;



int doGame();



int main() {

        doGame();

}



int doGame() {

        cout << "Worst Text Adventure Game Ever" << endl;

        cout << "Please select a character class number..." << endl;

        cout << "1)Fighter\n2)Wizard\n3)Cleric\n4)Thief\nEnter a number: ";

        

        int characterNum = 1;

        cin >> characterNum;



        int numHitPoints = 0;

        int numMagPoints = 0;

        string weaponName = "";

        string className = "";

        if (characterNum == 1) { /* Fighter */

                numHitPoints = 10;

                numMagPoints = 4;

                weaponName   = "Sword";

                className    = "Fighter";

        }

        else if (characterNum == 2) { /* Wizard */

                numHitPoints = 4;

                numMagPoints = 10;

                weaponName   = "Magic Staff";

                className    = "Wizard";

        }

        else if (characterNum == 3) { /* Cleric */

                numHitPoints = 7;

                numMagPoints = 7;

                weaponName   = "Magic Staff";

                className    = "Cleric";

        }

        else { /* Thief */

                numHitPoints = 8;

                numMagPoints = 6;

                weaponName   = "Short Sword";

                className    = "Thief";

        }

        cout << endl;

        cout << "Character Properties:\n";

        cout << "Class Name   = " << className << endl;

        cout << "Hit Points   = " << numHitPoints << endl;

        cout << "Magic Points = " << numMagPoints << endl;

        cout << "Weapon Name  = " << weaponName << endl;

        int monHP = 10;

        int monMP = 0;

        string monName = "Gorgoth";

        cout << "\nYou suddenly start a fight with " << monName << endl;

        while (numHitPoints > 0) {

                cout << monName << " takes 2 damage";

                numHitPoints -= 2;

                if (numHitPoints > 0) {

                        cout << "\nYou have " << numHitPoints << "HP left";

                        cout << "\nWhat do you want to do?\n1)Attack\n2)Magic Attack\n1 or 2? ";

                        int yourAttack = 0;

                        cin >> yourAttack;

                        if (yourAttack == 2) {

                                monHP -= 3;

                                cout << "You took 3 damage from " << monName << endl;

                                if (monHP > 0) {

                                        cout << monName << " now has " << monHP << "HP left" << endl;

                                }

                                else {

                                        cout << "You killed " << monName;

                                        exit(0);

                                }

                        }

                        else {

                                monHP -= 2;

                                cout << "You took 3 damage from " << monName << endl;

                                if (monHP > 0) {

                                        cout << monName << " now has " << monHP << "HP left" << endl;

                                }

                                else {

                                        cout << "You killed " << monName;

                                        exit(0);

                                }

                        }

                }

                else {

                        cout << "\nYou have died...:(\n";

                        exit(0);

                }

        }

}

Riot shield? Really?

for a naked man? wtf.......

i dont whanna know y they have the clubs out

Castrate him, what else?

Turn him into a eunuch!

*Takes out a Pistol. shoot someone with a Chainsaw.*

Falcon Bump!
Falcon Lunch!!

Quote:

Originally Posted by Synthfrisyr (Post 671741)

futurism!

This Is Madness!

Madness.....

This
Is
SPARTAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAhttp://i211.photobucket.com/albums/b...-main_Full.jpg http://i211.photobucket.com/albums/b...fTheMoon_3.jpg http://i211.photobucket.com/albums/b.../jupiter_b.jpg http://i211.photobucket.com/albums/b.../deepfield.jpg

Quote:

Originally Posted by Skurai (Post 671757)

Quote:

Originally Posted by Skurai (Post 672175)

Lol. No.

Lol, Fail quote!

Code:

public static function bbcode($str) {

        // Optionally, do this to break up words longer than 20 characters (without breaking code)

        // $str = preg_replace("/(([^\(\)\{\}\[\]_]\S){20})/","$1 ",$str);

        // Make sure htmlentities has been run through the text and that

        // $str = preg_replace("/(\r|\n)/","<br />",$str); // has been run through

        //-----------------------------------------

        // This is part of NRG's A3 PHP Framework

        // Do not redistribute, it is strictly forbidden by the license.

        $x = 0;

        $noparse = array();

        while (preg_match("/\[noparse\](.*)\[\/noparse\]/",$str)) {

                $noparse[$x] = preg_replace("/(.*?)\[noparse\](.*?)\[\/noparse\](.*)/","$2",$str);

                $str = preg_replace("/(.*?)\[noparse\](.*?)\[\/noparse\](.*)/","$1<PARSECODE_".$x.">$3",$str);

                $x += 1;

        }

        for ($x=0;$x<count($noparse);$x++) {

                $noparse[$x] = str_replace(array(":","[","]"),array(":","[","]"),$noparse[$x]);

                $str = str_replace("<PARSECODE_".$x.">",$noparse[$x],$str);

        }

        $codes = array();

        $codes[0] = "[b]param[/b]";

        $codes[1] = "[i]param[/i]";

        $codes[2] = "[u]param[/u]";

        $codes[3] = "[a]param[/a]";

        $codes[4] = "[a=param]param[/a]";

        $codes[5] = "[a,param]param[/a]"; // This is not necessary

        $codes[6] = "[s]param[/s]";

        $codes[7] = "[subscript]param[/subscript]";

        $codes[8] = "[superscript]param[/superscript]";

        $codes[9] = "[image]param[/image]";

        $codes[10] = "[code]param[/code]";

        $codes[11] = ":smile:";

        $codes[12] = ":sad:";

        

        $replw = array();

        $replw[0] = "<b>param1</b>";

        $replw[1] = "<i>param1</i>";

        $replw[2] = "<u>param1</u>";

        $replw[3] = "<a href=''param1'' rel=''nofollow''>param1</a>";

        $replw[4] = "<a href=''param1'' rel=''nofollow''>param2</a>";

        $replw[5] = "<a href=''param2'' class=''param1''>param2</a>";

        $replw[6] = "<s>param1</s>";

        $replw[7] = "<sub>param1</sub>";

        $replw[8] = "<sup>param1</sup>";

        $replw[9] = "<image src=''param1'' alt='''' />";

        $replw[10] = "<div class=''bb_code''>param1</div>";

        $replw[11] = "<image src=''img/smilies/smile.gif'' alt='''' />";

        $replw[12] = "<image src=''img/smilies/sad.gif'' alt='''' />";



        for ($x = 0; $x < count($codes); $x++) {

                $codes[$x] = preg_replace("/(\[|\]|\/)/","\\ $1",$codes[$x]);

                $codes[$x] = preg_replace("/\s/","",$codes[$x]);

                $codes[$x] = preg_replace(array("/\A/","/\z/"),array("/","/"),$codes[$x]);

                $codes[$x] = str_replace("param","(.*?)",$codes[$x]);

                $replw[$x] = str_replace("''","\"",$replw[$x]);

                $replw[$x] = str_replace("param","$",$replw[$x]);

        }

        $str = preg_replace($codes,$replw,$str);

        return $str;

}

This is a neat little function I made for my php A3 framework. Get rid of "public static" if you want to use this as a function. Normally it's inside my framework class.

Oh, and none of this is copied from anywhere. I designed this 2-days ago on my own. So taking it without credit, is strictly forbidden since my framework costs money.

------------------------------

As a test, I wrote this.

Framework Version
<?php
require("framework/a3.framework.php");
$str = ":smile::smile:BOLD[b]BOLD[/b] Hello [i][b]Hello[/b][/i]";
echo a3::bbcode($str);
?>

This version
<?php
// Put code above here right here (of course without "public static")
$str = ":smile::smile:BOLD[b]BOLD[/b] Hello [i][b]Hello[/b][/i]";
echo bbcode($str);
?>

I like posting code crap here. Eat it up! Rate it. Byte me.

Only problem I see, is stacking noparse will break noparse.

Edit:

Oh, I just found out that it also breaks Jelsoft's bb code system. How wonderful, I win! That means that apparently no one else has really come up with any other means of pulling that off. The way I did it is probably fairly similar to this boards way of doing it.

Outcome
:smile::smile:BOLD[b]BOLD[/b] Hello [i][b]Hello[/b][/i]